Un’Au Pair a casa tua: patti chiari amicizia lunga

educazioneglobale how to treat an au pairHo già scritto in un altro post come prendere un ragazza alla pari, quanto pagarla e così via. Ma come stabilire cosa deve o non deve fare? Come farle capire cosa ci si aspetta da lei? Come evitare brutte sorprese?

La risposta è semplice: mettendo le cose in chiaro da subito con un elenco preciso e dettagliato di compiti, aspettative, orari. Infatti, anche se quello con la au pair non è un rapporto di lavoro subordinato, è bene sin ad subito stabilire alcuni principi sul tipo di aiuto che ci si aspetta (baby sitting, piccolo aiuto domestico come apparecchiare o sparecchiare la tavola, prendere o portare i bambini da/a scuola alle/dalle attività extrascolastiche e così via).

La maggior parte dei genitori che prendono ragazze alla pari per i propri figli, lo fanno per aiutare i bambini ad apprendere una nuova lingua (ed, oltre a questo espediente, scelgono centri estivi in lingua o, in certi casi, persino scuole internazionali). Solitamente questa lingua è l’inglese (ma può essere anche il tedesco, il francese, lo spagnolo, il cinese mandarino o qualsivoglia altra lingua). Tuttavia, spesso sono i genitori stessi a non parlare bene la lingua straniera, così, alle differenze culturali con la au pair, si aggiungono equivoci e incomprensioni, con conseguenti malumori da entrambe le parti.

L’esperienza però aiuta. Negli anni ho stilato vari elenchi di punti importanti da trattare con la au pair.

Poiché noi prendiamo ragazze alla pari madrelingua inglese li ho redatti direttamente in inglese, ma come  può fare il genitore che l’inglese lo mastica poco? Semplice, ispirarsi a quanto ho scritto io.

Qui di seguito, quindi, ho riportato una bozza di quello che può diventare, con le opportune modifiche ed integrazioni, il tuo “contratto informale” con la ragazza alla pari.

Se ti piace copialo pure ma aiutami a diffondere questo ‘post’, cliccando alla fine della pagina, sulle icone dei social network che utilizzi (facebook, twitter o altro).

Ecco la bozza di “accordo” con la au pair. Dove trovi i puntini sospensivi, ovviamente, sta a te integrare con le informazioni necessarie.

DEAR AU PAIR,

hello and welcome to our house, please find here some indications on our expectations, on your tasks, plus a timetable and some general rules.

1. OUR EXPECTATIONS AND YOUR TASKS

We expect first of all that you are a person with a strong smiling attitude and capacity and enjoyment in dealing with children. Personal qualities we value are honesty and neatness.  We are non smokers and would like a non smoking girl. An interest in teaching to children would be a plus. We expect that you want to be part of our family, sharing our everyday life in an easy and fun way. We’d like to take care of you as you will take care of our kids.

In general, when you are working we therefore ask you not so much to be with the children, but to actively interact with them.

The reason we have au pairs is to improve our children’s English whilst widening their perspective on the world. What follows is a list to specific objectives to attain the goal of bilingualism, based on our previous experiences. Please do not feel daunted by it!  All we have written underneath will probably come natural to you, although you may feel awkward reading it.  On the other hand, if it does not come natural, a little guidance may be of help.

We expect that you:

  • speak only English with the children
  • take any opportunity whatsoever of speaking to them and with them and to make them talk as much as they can. This might mean, if your are not a very talkative person, putting in a little extra effort by asking them questions, or else by telling them anything that might be suitable (something that happened to you during the day, something funny you saw, things you did as a child ecc…). The bottom line or the main idea here is: talking, talking, talking!
  • gently correct them when they make mistakes. We say this as we have noticed that many mother-tongue speakers just let the children’s mistakes pass by over and over to the point that they do not realize they are, in fact, wrong. Please don’t be shy to repeat the correct version if one of them says, for example, “yesterday she camed with a new jacket”. Do it always, in a casual way. This is what parents do spontaneously with small children and this is how human beings learn language: immersion, repetition, correction, interaction.
  • read to them or with them
  • help them with their English homework and – since it is often too easy for them what they do in school – take the opportunity to ask a few more questions on each item (i.e. after they read the book assigned at school, question them so to understand whether they have understood the story)
  • play & chat with them (you can both propose games you like or just get involved in theirs), draw with them and engage them in anything that you remember have enjoyed as a child

2. YOUR TIMETABLE

  • You would work around ………….hours a week
  • Your pocket money will be ………..euros a week
  • Your free day(s) will be …….
  • Whenever you wish to take off the whole weekend (to go and visit another part of Italy, for example) you should just tell us in advance and could then make it up by working more hours the next week (we’ll arrange it on an “ad hoc” basis).
  • Normally, we would not need you in the morning, so you could sleep or do whatever you want up to the time of working (which would normally start in the afternoon, either at home or at the children’s school).
  • As for evening babysitting we might ask you to do …………
  • If we go out for the weekend we could decide together whether you want to come or not.

For all the rest, we offer and ask the maximum flexibility. We are looking forward to dinners and lunches together. On your free days you will either eat with us, cook on your own or go out, the way it pleases you most, just giving us prior notice.

When the children are not in school, they might go to a summer camp or stay home and we will rearrange your schedule and of course money on the new schedule (but with maximum flexibility to talk things over, it seems too soon to talk it over now).

As for all the rest, we can talk things over if and when you accept and we are willing to discuss anything with you.

3.  GENERAL RULES

  • Please have no stranger entering our house in our absence. We do not want anybody entering the house at all times if we are not there.
  • We normally do not expect you to perform any housework (apart from duties related to the children). However, we expect you to keep your room and bathroom tidy, leave kitchen tidy and clean if you use it or cooperate with us for day to day activities when needed, such as helping to set the table for dinner or lunch, just as a member of the family.
  • Please take care of switching off lights/air conditioned when you’re not in a room. Electricity is very expensive in Italy

Se ti è stato utile questo post aspetto i tuoi commenti. E, se non l’hai già fatto, non dimenticare di leggere il post su come accogliere una au pair:  eccolo qui.

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